inspiration

Leonard says learn to love the plateau

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Learn to love the practice

 

I guess I’m into absorbing new ideas these days as my last two posts are about books I’ve read. There’s an interesting idea expressed in George Leonard’s paper and e-book, Mastery – The Keys to Success and Long-Term Fulfillment. Leonard is a social scientist and Aikido master and I’m intrigued by his call for us to get lost in the ‘practice’ and make peace with riding the plateau.

Early in life we are pushed to “do” to “get” and focus on what comes next rather than where we are. We are urged as children to study hard so that we’ll get good grades. We are told to get good grades so that we’ll graduate from high school and get into college. We are told to graduate from high school and get into college so that we’ll get a good job. We are told to get a good job so that we can buy a house and a car. Again and again we are told to do one thing only so that we can get something else, be somewhere else. We spend our lives doing stuff so tomorrow will be better. But where does that leave us today? Sort of checked out from our lives.

See any parallels with diabetes? We are told to control our blood sugar so we don’t get complications, exercise so we’ll lose weight, lose weight so we become less insulin resistant. Of course we need to do all those things, but what if we were also taught at the same time to be one with the doing, enjoy the doing, don’t put all your eggs into the arrival; like a Zen master, see value and pleasure in the practice, get lost in it so that you are in the flow, totally in the moment. If you do that, not only will you be more present in your life but you will be creating the best chance for the positive outcomes we all want, and we may even notice and enjoy the journey.

When you’re ‘in the practice’ you’ll actually taste your food, maybe for the first time in a very long time. You’ll begin to enjoy the nutty flavor of whole grains by paying attention while you eat them, you’ll notice the natural sweetness in peaches and berries. When you exercise from the practice, you’ll feel your body’s strength and agility, its growing power, you’ll notice the endorphin-rush and Serotonin uptake, you’ll feel happy. Controlling your blood sugar when you are in the practice will imbue you with confidence, you will notice your growing capability, you will actually tune in to feeling proud. When we are so focused on the long, far away and abstract goals of living longer, staying healthy and avoiding complications, we are missing the moment, dismissing the pleasure in the moment and the opportunity for peace and pride in the every day practice.

“The real juice in life,” Leonard says in his book, “is to be found not so much in the product of our efforts as in the process itself, and how it feels to be alive.” We are taught in countless ways to value the end product, the prize, the blue ribbon or Olympic medal at the end of an endeavor, that climactic moment, not the pleasure of the moments that lead up to a medal, and then the next medal you might hang on your wall.

If our life is focused on mastery instead of wins, most of it Leonard says will be spent on a plateau–that long stretch of diligent effort with no seeming progress, for there are numerous inherent plateaus on the journey: learning, musing, germinating, reflecting, taking baby steps with only little bursts and puffs of what society deems as celebratory, noteworthy movement forward in-between. How much better if we were taught to love the plateau. If you honor the practice says Leonard you will enjoy the plateaus, “if not, a large part of your journey will be spent in restless, distracted, ultimately self-destructive attempts to escape the plateau to move faster and farther,” hither and thither missing the moment. I hope I pass you on your plateau as I sail by on mine and we are present enough in the moment to wave hello.

 

Diabetes can awaken you to your life’s purpose

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Screen Shot 2015-02-08 at 3.45.51 PMUse diabetes to create a greater life and a new earth

March 3rd Oprah’s launching the biggest book club ever on her web site – it’s global and they’ll be reading a book I read two years ago and was so taken with when I lifted it up off my friend’s coffee table in Scottdale, that she had to gift it to me. Which she did.  Since the world is beginning to pick it up, I dipped in again last night. The book is  A New Earth- Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose by Eckhart Tolle.

A new earth is about detaching from your ego and waking up to your inner consciousness. When you come from your inner spirit, not your ego, you will be an instrument for positive change in the world, so says Tolle. This is the act of leaving your identification of yourself as your ego behind; residing in the consciousness that you truly are, whose purpose is to create good, both in your life and the world, and can do so supremely better than our small, defensive, judgmental egos.

The passage I read last night struck me in relation to this journey we’re on living with diabetes. Talking about loss Tolle says, “there are many accounts of people who experienced an emerging new dimension of consciousness as a result of tragic loss at some point in their lives. Some lost all their possessions, others their children or spouse, their social position, reputation or physical abilities. Whatever they had identified with, whatever gave them their sense of self, had been taken away. Then suddenly and inexplicably, the anguish or intense fear they initially felt, gave way to a sacred sense of Presence, a deep peace and serenity and complete freedom from fear.”

Paraphrasing what Tolle goes on to say here’s the message — When there is nothing to identity with anymore, who are you? Your sense of  “I am” is freed from being tangled up with concrete forms. You realize your essential being, your true self, is consciousness itself.

Not everyone reacts to loss with this realization. Some create a strong mental image (thought form) seeing themselves as a victim, whether of circumstances other people or fate. This thought form of themselves creates anger, resentment, self-pity, and they strongly identify with it. The ego then identifies with this new form. The fact that this form is a deeply unhappy one, doesn’t concern the ego much. As long as the ego has an identity it is happy.

Whenever tragic loss occurs, you either resist it or you yield to it. Some people become bitter and deeply resentful, others become compassionate, wise and loving. Yielding means you are accepting what is and you are open to life.

If you take action from resistance and negativity you will create more resistance and negativity in your life; life will not be helpful. When the shutters are closed the sunlight cannot come in so to speak. However, when you yield, when you surrender, a new dimension of consciousness opens. If action is necessary, yours will be in alignment with the greater good and supported by creative intelligence. Circumstances and people become helpful and cooperative. Positive coincidences happen. If no action is necessary, you rest in peace and inner stillness. You rest in God.

Tolle is a great spiritual teacher and I am an avid believer. It’s always been my message that we should try to see our diabetes as a loss that can lead to greater positive determination, empathy, compassion, appreciation and quality of life. Yield and find your strength, power and ability to transform yourself, your life and the world for greater good. I’m with you Tolle. I’m with you Oprah.

Diabetes Resolutions – is it time to get fired up again?

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O.K., time to take stock. As for New Year’s resolutions, if you’ve already given up on your resolutions you’re among the greater 64% who have too. How about your diabetes resolutions? Did you make any? If so, you may well have given up on those too, or nearly. Change is hard!

I don’t make resolutions of any sort because if I’m really committed to doing something, I don’t have to make a declaration about it, and if I’m not committed it won’t get done whether I say it will or not. So what gets in the way? The experts say stress, mood swings and boredom are largely what dash our resolutions into the snow or the sand depending on your geographic clime, weeks after we make them and throw us off our well intentioned paths. Sounds about right.

Resolutions typically require changing your behavior – doing things differently on a steady basis. This means forming new habits. Did you know it takes at least 3 to 4 weeks to form a new habit? And, it’s not a straight road to success, you’ll stumble on your way. Whether you get back up and continue toward your goal depends on you – your commitment, how important the goal is to you and how compelling your motivation is. So each resolution is deeply personal and each resolutioner has his or her very individual level of commitment and impediments. But here are two rules of thumb that apply across the board. 1) Don’t put excess pressure on yourself when forming a new habit to do it quickly or do it perfectly. These expectations will defeat you before you barely begin. 2) Appreciate any and every step you take in the right direction. If you see success as moving in the right direction rather than goal completion, you’ll gain new steam from your improvement alone.

Psychologists also talk about a “change muscle.” Figuratively, it’s a place in your body that has captured a memory of you having successfully made a change before. Connecting with this place and drawing upon this memory and energy can help you; your remembrance of change and success can inspire you to move forward with more conviction when things get tough.

Also, a support team is helpful when you’re trying to make a change. Whether it’s your spouse, a friend, neighbor or community resources, reach out, it’s easier if you’re not going it alone. Sometimes you just need a cheerleading squad, especially when your mind, as punishment for self-assessed failure, has placed you in front of your own personal firing squad.

Thinking about where I draw support from in addition to my family and friends, I remembered a poem I read long ago. It talks about a higher spirit always being there to help us. It gives me comfort. You will probably remember having read it before too:

Footprints in the Sand Copyright © 1984 Mary Stevenson

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.

Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.

Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,

other times there was one only.

This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life,

when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat,

I could see only one set of footprints, so I said to the Lord,

“You promised me Lord, that if I followed you,

you would walk with me always.

But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life

there has only been one set of footprints in the sand.

Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?”

The Lord replied, “The years when you have seen only one set of footprints,

my child, is when I carried you.”

Even if you’ve given up your resolutions, nothing says you can’t start again right now. There’s no need to wait another 330 days.

Try telling yourself you’re going to “practice” your change this year. It will take the pressure off and chances are it will actually become real when you’re not even looking.

Hope, the new 4-letter word?

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The new face of radical chic

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Reading the New York Sunday Times Arts & Leisure section yesterday I read an article titled, “The Rebel Director, Sincere and Hopeful.”

It’s about Carl Forsman, artistic director of a theatre company that stages only performances that embody hope and humanity. “I’ve thought for a while now that maybe true theatrical rebellion isn’t saying, ‘And then a guy raped a 4-year old and shot his mom,” said Forsman, “that’s not radical anymore because we’re so desensitized. Now I think true rebellion is saying anything optimistic or positive about humanity. Hope is radical.”

Wow, my ears tingled. I made an immediate connection between what he said to what I’m trying to do here — teaching how we can better manage diabetes through positive emotions like joy, courage, confidence, gratefulness, love, hope and pride – rather than the more usual focus on negative emotions – denial, guilt, shame, depression, anger. Wow, maybe the positive landscape I’m trying to paint isn’t squishy or naive or infantile, but radical! Gutsy even and hiply progressive! Cool, I’m a radical hipster!

I’ve wondered these past few weeks getting more aggressive about posting my “thrive” rather than “survive” attitude that you will think I just dropped out of a Kansas cornfield or was born with a silver spoon. Actually neither are true. My Buddhist ‘appreciate everything’ mantra comes from an ordinary middle class upbringing in the Bronx and on Long Island and my extremely shy, formative years when I learned to observe others rather than talk much.

Thankfully, those days are long gone, and while they were lonely and painful, I developed a keen eye for observation, a curiosity for what people really feel deep down, and an empathetic understanding for people’s hardships and hurts. But wait — now I can consider myself a “radical hipster.” Oh, how long I’ve waited!

Perhaps I’m catching a new wave where being positive is gutsy in our overly cynical, negative culture. I do so often feel I’m sticking my neck out against the chorus of nay-sayers who prefer to moan and groan.

Mr. Forsman went on to say, “There’s no question that the cynical viewpoint is viewed as more sophisticated. There’s a real fear, especially among the intelligentsia, of generosity and compassion because they look like the acts of someone who’s naïve.” God knows I live in the land of which he speaks, New York City, where black is our representative color. Now I’m thinking maybe black here is not just a fashion statement but a statement of mind.

So, I am all tingly and excited as a radical diabetes auteur and I will continue to say, adopt an attitude of gratitude, despite your diabetes or because of it — because it can give you a second chance at life — the life you’ve put aside, let remain a dream or run into the ground without really noticing.

Diabetes is your second chance to get fit and healthy and avoid a far worse fate that may be heading your way. Now maybe it will help you to think of yourself as ‘radical’ not ‘Pollyanna’ or ‘compliant;’ to be brave enough to fly in the face of the general public’s and mass media’s mass cynicism.

After all, it’s the people with guts and vision, who moved by their very personal dreams and hopes, end up changing the world.

 

More on chronic illness and supercharging life

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As I expected, this morning’s Today Show featured another segment on Richard Cohen’s new book, “Strong at the Broken Places.” Five people are profiled about living courageously with chronic illness. Today they had 4 of the 5 people on the show and here’s basically what they said:  

“Our thoughts and our beliefs go into our cells and become us and what we do.”

“Saddle up for your life. Life isn’t going to be easy, but make the best of it. Sometimes it’s an ongoing battle to accept myself, but I’m going to do what I can while I’m here.”

“It’s hard that people can’t tell you’re ill.” Boy, I know this one. 

“What you believe about mental illness may be more destructive than the illness itself. Look at our strength and think of us as strong as other people.”

Personally, I find “courage” a really great word for describing the quality we embody living with chronic illness well. 

Later in the program there was a segment on Supercharged Changes for Better Health. A series of segments they’ve been running this week to get us off to a fresh start for the new year. plus size model, Emme, and a therapist were talking about accepting yourself and stop beating yourself up because it’s not motivational, and give up the guilt – about weight and body image. They gave these general recommendations which I thought  apt for anyone:

1. Leave body-bashing and low self-esteem by the roadside

2. Hang out with friends for soul nourishment

3. Enrich your life with new hobbies, activities and people

4. Don’t forget you’re a role model, especially for your children

You can easily apply these to living with diabetes. So, I’m sensing a cosmic shift in the public consciousness that a more positive mindset will help one live a healthier, more fulfilling life. I’ll raise a glass to that!


 

Learning from others with chronic illness

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Screen Shot 2015-02-08 at 3.50.25 PMFinding strength in chronic illness

I’ve been watching video profiles this week on The Today Show – interviews with the people featured in Richard Cohen’s new book, “Strong at the Broken Places.” Cohen, a journalist, who has had MS for over 20 years and two bouts of cancer, wrote this book as a follow-up to his previous, “Blindsided.” After the publication of that book the response showed him that the public wanted to hear from people who live bravely with the challenges of illness, and that there are many people in the isolated world of illness who want to share their story. “Strong at the Broken Places,” Cohen says came from this desire of the many to share their stories in the hope that the sick, and those who love them, will see that they are not alone.

Diabetes is not represented in the five profiles but there are lessons for all of us to take away from those featured: Denise, a sufferer of ALS, Buzz with non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma, Sarah, a social worker in the poorest areas of Cleveland with Crohn’s disease; Ben, a college student with muscular dystrophy; and Larry, whose bipolar disorder is hidden within. The five vary in age and gender, race and economic status, but they share a determinion to live life on their own terms. Intimately involved with these patients’ lives, Cohen formed intense relationships with each and shared joy even in heart-breaking situations.

Though each individual’s illness wreaks havoc in a different way, Cohen shows how their experiences are strikingly similar and offer lessons—on self-determination, on courage in the face of adversity and public ignorance, on keeping hope alive, and on finding strength and peace under the most difficult  circumstances. Lessons we can certainly profit from living with diabetes.

The title, “strong at the broken places,” Cohen says, means we are stronger than we think. The series is likely to continue through the week on The Today Show since Cohen is married to host, Meredith Viera, and living with chronic illness appears to be coming more into the public eye.

Life isn’t what happens to you but what you do with it

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Little girl_2Focus on the good stuff more

If you come here every now and then you may have noticed something has changed. It’s the text above the clown to the left. “Choose thrive over surviveliving with diabetes.”

What I really want to do throughout this year is remind you that while none of us would have asked for diabetes, and it’s a semi-regular (O.K. almost constant) pain in the butt, and I myself go from highs to lows both in my blood sugar and my frustration level, I still try to remain focused on my blessings. The good in my life — and what diabetes gives me. If I were to see diabetes as a limitation, it will limit me. If I were tosee diabetes as a pain in the butt, my butt would hurt more. If I see it, however, as a stimulus to creating a bigger, more generous and purposeful life, then it does this for me.

I am doing work I love, helping others with diabetes through my talks, this web site, my new book, The ABCs Of Loving Yourself With Diabetes (soon for sale on this web site) and articles inDiabeteshealth magazine. I am more fit than ever, look better in my clothes than ever, don’t care anymore what anyone thinks of me or the fact that I’m bucking conventional therapy with diabetes (well maybe that comes from being over 50) and am foolishly, happily hopeful that some people benefit from my doing what I’m doing.

Rather than curse my lot in life every day my sight is set on appreciating how strong, courageous and resilient I am to get up and take on diabetes again. Like it does for all of us, it requires living with complications staring over one shoulder while taking the best care of myself to keep them at bay. All the while leaving room for spontaneity, joy, light-heartedness and the craziness of everyday life.

In all the literature about diabetes, no one talks about thriving with diabetes or using pride to manage it. Why not? Why is everything gloom, doom, poor me and isn’t this horrible? Sorry, but this is not very motivational. Why are all the emotional associations with diabetes frustration, worry, shame, depression, guilt and anger? Again, lest you read this wrong, I would never line up to get diabetes or be a “diabetes wanna-be” but as they say, “Life happens when you’re making other plans” and “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.”

Medical models seem to only see the bad news in illness. Doctors are trained in acute care — to stop ill health, heal it, cure it. But patients of chronic illness have to find the good news, because our condition is not going away. Since the 1970’s hippies, self-help and business gurus, spiritualists, and song-writers have told us to look for the silver lining, the gift in a problem, the opportunity in a challenge, the learning in failure. This thinking, however, doesn’t seem to have yet crossed over into medicine and disease. But I figure, since every morning I’m going to wake up with diabetes, and there’s nothing I can do to cure it, why not find something positive about it? Why not find something in treating it that makes me feel good about myself?  I am damn proud of all I do, medically and emotionally to keep myself tracking, even with my other life constantly at my doorstep: the shopping, cooking, keeping the house clean, oy, running to airports and meeting work deadlines.

My message this year is this — explore, examine and find at least one good thing that’s come from having diabetes. Maybe you’ve gotten your act together about eating better or received praise for your new svelte figure or are in training to run your first marathon. I know many people who were headed for heart attacks that no longer are. I also know many fellow baby boomers slipping away to far more devastating or terminal illnesses, in part because they didn’t take care of themselves. I’m not saying there aren’t bad days, or bad patches or emotions that make you want to rail against everyone and everything at times, there are. What I am saying is your overall attitude about living with diabetes will impact the experience and your actions, so why not pick the attitude that will benefit you?

In looking for one good thing that diabetes has given you maybe you’ve decided you’re finally going to dedicate some time to that dream you left along the roadside.  Maybe diabetes has helped you realize the value of time and where you’d like more of yours to go. Maybe diabetes has made you more compassionate of other’s misfortunes and more thankful yours doesn’t involve a permanent wheelchair or loss of brain cells. Maybe you realize how capable you are of meeting life’s challenges. Personally, I am happy I no longer want to shoot myself when I catch my reflection unexpectedly in the mirror. While my every day walk controls my calories and blood sugar, it also makes me feel I’ve accomplished something and kept a promise to myself. Every day that walk is a reminder I take care of my health. I’m also quite proud of myself for keeping my blood sugars so consistently in target range by testing and correcting more. And while someone will moan and boo-hoo about having to do that, I’m so grateful I can do it with today’s tools and that I even know the importance of doing it. I didn’t 20 years ago. And, worrying whether someone would marry a diabetic, well, I’m so over that!

If you cultivate a grateful heart this year, I promise you your life will change. I also promise you it may not be easy and your progress may not be steady, but it will pay off. Like most things it requires practice. So I’ll let you in on the real deal at this very moment: I’m writing this with an awful cold and would really prefer to be lounging in bed. I’m annoyed that I can’t go out and take my walk this week or likely next because I have absolutely no energy. I’m waiting every day for my blood sugar to rise because I’m sick and not getting any physical activity and so am reducing my insulin sensitivity – GRUNT! GRUNT! GRUNT! Am I a hypocrite? No, just up against it. As they say, this is a “teachable moment.”  I am being made aware I have to practice something I preach. So I recall what I read in one of Wayne Dyer’s books years ago — when a negative thought comes to mind say “STOP!” and replace it with a positive thought. Mine right now is I can order 3 new movies from netflix and indulge my laziness. Of course, since I’m now spending lots of time on the couch reading The Omnivore’s Dilemma, a positive thought may not happen anytime soon.

But here’s my final thought. The prescription I’d give everyone for managing diabetes for the long haul is to get the basics down and then get on with it. Maybe that’s what should show up on more physician’s script pads. Unfortunately then it would be illegible. Ah, well, so chomp on this: the world is still waiting for you to make your mark, with or without diabetes.

Dancing with no legs

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I’ve intended all along to post excerpts from the more than 100 interviews I’ve conducted with fellow diabetics, their loved ones and specialists. Somehow I didn’t get ’round to it — until now. Since it’s the new year, it seems apt to begin with a woman whose story contains so much sorrow, and yet so much joy, and of course a lesson for us all. Her story reminds me, over and over, that it’s not what happens to us that determines our life, but how we respond to what happens. Cliché as it is, are you looking at your glass as half empty or half full?

The Early Years

Kathryn is 65, she got diabetes at 9 and then TB in her native England at 12 and went into a sanitarium for 18 months. During her sanitarium stay her mother passed away. This is certainly enough to mark any child’s life not to mention she learned of her mother’s passing from a minister at the sanitarium whom she’d never met. After her mother’s death, Kathryn remained at the sanitarium another nine months. Twice she slipped into a diabetic coma for days, in part because the doctors didn’t use IVs to revive diabetics from comas. Instead, they force fed them chocolate waiting for their sugar to rise. The day we talk she laughs as she tells me about waking up with chocolate wrappers all around her!

Having missed so much schooling, when Kathryn got out of the sanitarium she went straight to work, and then at 19 left Britain to live with an Aunt in Canada. Not long after, Kathryn met and married her husband who was a loving partner and extremely supportive of her diabetes. After enduring a heart attack and cataract surgery, he urged her to get a meter, which she initially fought, feeling she was poking herself enough with her daily injections. But when she could come up with no good excuses not to have one, she gave in. Today Kathryn lives alone, having lost her partner, but she has learned a lot in the past decade about caring for herself: she tests her blood sugar 4-5 times a day, has learned how to eat properly, counts carbs and is a svelte 126 pounds. But, for so many diabetics who got their illness long before today’s management tools and strategies, Kathryn is also a double amputee. A double amputee who dances, drives and laughs a lot.

The Legs

The first leg she told me giggling was taken off five years ago. “The doorbell rang nine o’clock at night while I was on the sofa lying down,” said Kathryn. “I got up and opened the door, it was a pizza delivery, of course it wasn’t for me and crossing to the door I stepped on a staple.” Because of Kathryn’s neuropathy she didn’t feel anything, a wound developed that turned into gangrene, incredible pain and the leg came off.

If you think I’ve been setting you up to cry over Kathryn and her unhappy life, you’re wrong. She’s about the most cheerful person I’ve ever spoken with. “The surgery,” she continued, “was scheduled for my sixtieth birthday. I went in and had my leg off and the first thing I said when I came ‘round was, I’ve got no more pain. I healed in five weeks, which they all found amazing and I was fitted for a prosthetic below the knee. I call it ‘the full Monty.’ We’ve all had quite a few laughs over this. Six months later,” Kathryn said, “I lost my other leg. I tripped over my wheelchair while trying to stand up and my foot got caught under the wheel and damaged my toe. The gangrene set in fast and the leg came off fast. I was in hospital within three days and off it came. So now they all know me down there at the hospital. and now I’ve got two prosthetics, Monty and Mathew.” Again, she tells me with a wink.

“I drive, I dance, life is what you make it. This year I’m going to England for two and a half months. I’m going on a Mediterranean cruise, I’m going down the Nile and to see the pyramids and to Turkey and Greece. I’m quite excited about the whole thing,” Kathryn informed me.

The Laughs

“To me, losing my legs was a blessing. The pain they gave me stopped, and I could do things. Imagine, I don’t have to wear diabetic shoes anymore! I don’t have to have pedicures. I don’t need to shave my legs! There are so many positives!” But when she said this, I truly had to laugh out loud. “Recently my friends and I went to a dinner theatre and I was sitting at the table and my leg was killing me and I said I have to take my leg off so I did, under the table. It was dark, no one could see, so I took it off. At the end of the play I put my leg back on and got up and I realized I’d caught the tablecloth in my leg and it was skidding off the table coming toward me as I walked away. What a hoot!

“Now I talk to other people at the hospital who are going to have their legs off and I really enjoy doing that. I am so happy to help. Every year I talk to the graduating class of the University of Alberta. Mostly people wonder how I manage it all, and my attitude. They think it’s unreal that I dance and drive. But I just can’t sit home and feel sorry for myself. I was at the theatre last night and I’m going to the symphony on Saturday. I like to get out and meet people. I also have a habit, I’m afraid. I go around singing a lot. When I’m at the hospital people find me coming round the corner legs off singing away.

The Way

“My attitude comes up a lot,” Kathryn said, as I too was amazed listening to her. “I think my positive spirit comes partly from my mum because she went through an awful lot, yet I’d never seen her cry. I’ve come through a lot in my life, I really have with the TB, losing my mum, all sorts of things and yet I’ve always been positive. I had a career working with children which I loved. I couldn’t have children which was a bit of a disappointment, but I have two adopted children and now I’ve got wonderful grandchildren. I have a fantastic circle of friends, they’re all very, very good to me. They all help me out.

“I don’t say I don’t have down days, I do. I don’t think you’d be normal if you didn’t but basically I’m an upbeat person. I’m quite happy with life and I’m doing well. I see the future as bright. I’m not too sure what else can happen but I’m going to enjoy the time while I’ve got it.”

Well, I don’t know if attitude and optimism are nature or nurture or a bit of both, but I do know how we interpret what happens in our lives and how we judge where we are in our lives, determines the quality of our lives and the satisfaction and happiness we feel. Even though Kathryn has no legs it certainly hasn’t slowed her down and that’s due to a decision she made along the way – life will not stop me as long as I can still get up.

“Just do what you want to do,” Kathryn ended our talk with. “And don’t let diabetes stop you. Don’t let it take control of you or rule or ruin your life. You’ve still got things to do with your life.” Then she told me something that surprised me, “You know I’ve never really talked to anyone about all this but you. I don’t talk about this a lot.” But it didn’t shock me when she followed up with, “You know, all the time I was in the hospital they wanted me to go to a support group but I wouldn’t. I don’t want to feel sorry for myself or hear myself say, “When I had my surgery…blah, blah, blah.”

The day I interviewed Kathryn I was feeling physically awful. I’d had a bad cold and sore throat for two weeks and it wasn’t improving. My sinuses were hurting, my ears were hurting, every night I had difficulty falling asleep because the very mild neuropathy I have in one calf was acting up and my tinnitus was roaring. Need I say after listening to Kathryn that day I was made aware, once again, just how lucky I am. So for the new year let’s all try to ‘count our blessings’ more often. I’m sure Kathryn’s tying on her dance shoes just about now.

 

 

 

7, a lucky number, even with diabetes

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Remember that ground-breaking management book from Stephen Covey – The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People? Well, Mr. Covey and the American Association of Diabetes Educators (AADE), with support from Bayer Diabetes Care, have released a small pamphlet applying his 7 habits to diabetes care. Covey’s inspiration for the booklet? His wife was diagnosed with diabetes.

I imagine the thinking behind this booklet is to give patients a new tool to manage their diabetes, adding to the typical diet, exercise, meds routine. This tool has the patient draw from a more emotive place: understanding, listening, cooperating and picturing your perfect life. What impresses me is the head-nod to the fact that managing diabetes is not just about medical management, but includes our emotional, mental and spiritual being. Covey’s habits are:

1)   Be Proactive – Choose your actions, and be responsible for them

2)   Begin with the End in Mind – Create a vision for your life based on what is most important to you

3)   Put First Things First – Prioritize tasks based on importance and what one thing can you do regularly that will make a positive difference in your life?

4)   Think Win-Win – Build relationships with others by helping them succeed, too. From this you create the positive energy of cooperation which leads to success in all things in your life, including diabetes management.

5)   Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood – It’s about listening. Listen to your health care team to gain the practical skills of self-care

6)   Synergize – Combine guidance from your team and support from friends and family

7)   Sharpen the Saw – Keep everything sharp: your body, mind and spirit

It’s hopeful watching the AADE move in this patient-empowerment direction. In a perfect world, patients’ attention, with the help of their educator, would be on greater quality of life, not so singly focused on diabetes task management, but weaving that into a vivid picture of a happy and healthy life. For a positive vision of our life is truly where our motivation and energy come from — for all things — including managing diabetes. Diabetes educators would exhibit less ‘directorial skills’ and more coaching skills, helping people design a ‘life plan’ with diabetes in it, rather than just a ‘numbers plan’ — blood sugar, blood pressure, lipids, you get the idea. But since we can’t ignore the numbers aspect of diabetes management, at the back of the booklet you’ll find the AADE’s 7 self-care behaviors.

The booklet is a nice start. To get yours – and it’s free – go to: http://http://www.diabetes7.org. What we need now is a well-trained team of educators ready and able to help patients put these habits into play. Well, I guess one can’t ask for the moon, the stars and the sun all at once. But this moonbeam is a small ray of hope. For more information about the AADE, particularly if you’re looking for a diabetes educator in your area, go to: http://www.diabeteseducator.org. 

 

 

What if diabetes was just “the new normal?”

/ rivagreenberg / Leave a comment

Bayer just started running a new TV campaign for their meter, the Contour. Funny, I rarely think of Bayer in relation to diabetes. I think aspirin, even though a few months ago I participated in a focus group for Bayer’s Contour meter and learned they have a whole division devoted to diabetes care. Still, I think aspirin. But they’re beginning to change my mind. Maybe they’re even beginning to change people’s minds about diabetes with this new campaign, subtle as it is.

While in the focus group I remember reviewing four concepts for the Contour. Two were very positive, and one had a tagline something like, “Yeah, I have diabetes, and, I enjoy my life.” That one must have made it because I heard something like that in their commercial. Remarkably, they’re not talking about the work of diabetes, which actor Wilford Brimley talks about selling diabetes Medicare supplies. They don’t have a combative diva like Patti LaBelle, declaring, “I control diabetes, it doesn’t control me!” And it’s not alarmist, as in the new public awareness campaign for A1cs. It’s just an upbeat lifestyle spot where ordinary people doing ordinary things say to camera, “Life with diabetes? It’s about going for it!” “Life with diabetes? Getting more just got easier.” 

A little trite? Sure. A little simplistic? You bet, but I kinda like it. What I like is it’s not threatening, frightening or bullying. It says ‘I take diabetes on the chin, no biggie.’ While us type 1s know diabetes is no walk in the park, and most type 2s probably feel the same, this may actually help type 2s feel that diabetes is manageable and not the end of life as they knew it. The tone of the pitch, and its upbeat takeaway, actually makes me feel a little more upbeat.

A few weeks ago reading Jill Sklar’s book, The 5 Gifts of Illness, I thought, ‘What if as people grow older, type 2 diabetes was just ‘the new normal?’ I mean, everyone’s getting it, so what if we didn’t look at it as an aberration, but it was expected, as in — you get older, you get wrinkles, and you get diabetes. Truth is, many experts say if you live long enough most people will get diabetes. My 84 year old father has just been diagnosed. But, trust me, that’s another story.

I mean would we look at diabetes differently if it was expected? If it was just “the new normal” at some point in our lives? Of course for type 1s it’s a little different, but still if everyone expected to get diabetes would that change how we view diabetes, and how we live with diabetes? Would people greet it more gracefully and with less alarm and overwhelm? Would people be more accepting of the lifestyle changes diabetes requires? Just as we expect to slow down as we age, maybe if we knew diabetes was a natural part of aging, we might also accept eating less and moving more as what we’re supposed to do when it arrives: the very behaviors that will keep us healthier as we age. Of course, it’s likely some people would deny their diabetes, fight it or fear it I suppose just as they do now. But others would accept it more easily, and still others would embrace it as the impetus to make the last few decades of their lives healthier and more rewarding. I have no answers, but it’s an interesting proposition don’t you think? And, going a step further, if you embrace this notion, you might find you view your diabetes differently.

On a final note, I will tell you about my experience of Bayer’s Contour meter. I was given one last week by a cde. After years of using One Touch meters, I may just prefer the Contour and it took me by surprise. It seems to require half the amount of blood the One Touch does and draw it up twice as fast. Hmmm… it’ll be interesting to watch Bayer as they get into the ring with the big boys.